“Make No Promises to Marry”

“If you want to be treated as an equal in marriage, complete your education.” This was the message from one of the three chiefs of a rural district in Malawi to girls who are entering secondary school. This morning, I was with three chiefs and a group of mothers, community leaders, district education members, staff of Camfed and students, including several Mastercard Foundation Secondary School Scholars, gathered at a local secondary school.

They embraced me with the warmth of their welcoming song and dance. After an opening prayer, we began our discussions. Occasions like this one are special times for me to listen and learn from people who are ensuring girls in their community attend secondary school.

Their stories came from their experience, their words from their hearts. Mothers beamed with pride when they explained how their income-generating activities are enabling them to cover the costs of books and uniforms for boys and girls. Mastercard Foundation Scholars told me that, thanks to the scholarship, they felt like every other student at school, and not distinguished by their poverty.

The strongest advocates for girls’ education were the three chiefs. Each imparted personal life-lessons from his time at school, and work. Most surprising to me, each also shared his reflections on relationships and marriage with the girls. All three said they are alarmed by the high teenage pregnancy rates in Malawi, the main reason why girls drop out of school.

“Men will come to you and say, ‘marry me,’ ” one of the chiefs warned the girls. “They’ll say you go to school; don’t believe them. It seldom works out. You have lots of time to get married, but now you must focus on school and becoming independent. So, make no promises to marry.”